parody of tik tok by ke$ha

wake up in the morning i hear lion dance
grab my glasses i tie my hair with only one hairband
before i leave brush my teeth with a box of mcchicken
so when i leave for my school i will smell like poo

i'm looking in the mirror
i think who's that ugly girl
i talk with a lipse
i like to make everyone pissed
i died in 2012
i didn't do homework
oh damn

oh my gosh what's wrong with me
i think i need to go pee
i slammed the class door on my friend's pinky
i said that i was sorry but she still hates me now
let's eat hokkiean mee ooh oh oh oh

here in my school we've got plenty of paper
i like it when my teacher buys me some beer
now all my friends are getting drunk and it's my fault
and now everyone would hate me even more

i'm talking 'bout friends who love my hair
they ignore my dandruff
gonna slap them if they touch my dandruff
they like to sit with me at lunch
i'll be number one
i'll be number one
and i am number one

to rush down to the canteen
let's all eat mixed beans
my friends all think that i am rich cause i will always hold
some food but i am not
and i hate captains ball
especially rugby ouchouchouh!